In the midst of a bout of frustration and pretending I didn't have a mountain of work to do before the end of the semester for both classes and my assistantship, I took a few hours to re-read Slaughterhouse-Five. Vonnegut created a slew of characters that I can identify with and understand each reading, and in the most recent reading, I connected with the journey of Billy.
For those who have not read Slaughterhouse-Five, I'll hopefully be able to balance doing justice to the work without also giving away the entire plot. Billy uniquely travels through time, and knows exactly how, when, and where he will eventually die - because he has already seen it. Billy's life was also impacted by his time as a POW captured by Germans during World War II. One of the most interesting concepts brought to light is the concept of free will.
Free will, and my determination that reading Slaughterhouse-Five would help me feel more inclined to better balance the stress of school, work, and the "we're talking but not really talking enough to make this a relationship but maybe it will be a relationship soon" factors that are making life interesting. I forgot to mention that I am also working on an internal assistantship search as well as the beginnings of a thesis...if only I could juggle half as well in real life. I hear jugglers are paid well. ;)
At the fateful point any bookworm knows best - the point where you only have a few pages to read, but a small piece of you is unwilling to allow the story to end - my thoughts turned to school again. Voila! Refreshed and recharged to continue my homework...or so it goes.
I have been immersed in vectors the past few weeks in challenging myself to better understand Chickering, especially considering I gave a brief presentation last Wednesday. In thinking about the fact that the semester is nearly over, I considered my current opinion toward theory - it still strikes me as interesting, but the application piece can be infuriating because of how targeted some theories are to specific audiences (race, religion, etc.). In some ways, I was reminded in my theory class as to one of my primary frustrations with history: the obsession with things that have already happened, ideas of those who have died, and discussions that demonstrated minimal understanding of the basic content. I feel as though I was challenged to remember some dates and important points, but that I don't necessarily know much about a specific theory or could apply the theory without a listing of its vectors, stages, levels, etc. To be fair, it is difficult to learn something as intense as theories that guide and define an entire career field within the time span of a single semester.
If nothing else, my interest has been sparked and I believe I could enter a conversation and have a basic understanding of theories commonly used in higher education. I am hopeful that there will be some great conversations and opportunities for thought where the knowledge gained through this semester becomes applicable. One of my largest hurdles was becoming "unstuck" to the timeline of theory and its creation, and instead understanding that any theory may be applied regardless of when it was created. Much like Billy in Slaughterhouse-Five, my thoughts were upon how one exercises their free will to develop a better understanding of life.
In the words of Vonnegut: All this happened, more or less.
